Melanie Potock

😰 Sometimes a child isn’t afraid of the food. They’re afraid of what might happen AFTER they eat it.
👉🏻This is #7 in @mymunchbug_melaniepotock ‘s ARFID, PFD Autism & Anxiety series and subtype #3: Concern about aversive consequences of eating. (🙏🏻Thank you @drmichaelmilobsky for collaborating with Melanie today!)

For some children, there may have been a frightening food-related experience:
Choking.
Vomiting.
An allergic reaction.

Some children may also have an anxious temperament or be particularly sensitive to sensations happening inside their bodies.

Then come the predictions:
💭 “What if I choke?”
💭 “What if I throw up?”
💭 “What if I have another reaction?”

The child may begin avoiding the original food, similar foods, or situations they associate with that frightening experience.
They stay in their familiar food zone and avoid new food experiences whenever possible.

And once again, we see the same powerful cycle:
Avoidance → temporary relief from anxiety → more avoidance.

Or, in the words you’ll hear throughout this series:
“The more I avoid, the less anxiety I will feel.”

❤️ That’s why we have to look beyond WHAT a child refuses and become curious about WHY they’re avoiding it. What FEELING are they trying to avoid, which then causes them to avoid the food?

We’ve now covered all three ARFID subtypes. Next, we’re going to keep digging into avoidance and what it means for helping anxious eaters move forward. Have you been following along?

Melanie Potock – Dr. Michael Miblosky – Pediatrician - ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Food Avoidance | Fear of Choking | Anxious Eater | Feeding Therapy | Pediatric Feeding

“But they can tell there’s ONE tiny speck of difference in their food!”🤦🏼‍♀️
Yep. For some children with ARFID, the sensory characteristics of food can be incredibly powerful.

👉🏻This is #6 in my ARFID, Autism & Anxiety series and subtype #2: Avoidance based on the sensory characteristics of food.

Texture.
Smell.
Taste.
Appearance.
Temperature.

A child may be particularly sensitive to food characteristics, and unfamiliar sensory experiences may trigger disgust, fear or anxiety.

So they stay with familiar foods.
They avoid unfamiliar foods.
And they avoid new food EXPERIENCES whenever possible.

🤔Why?
Because avoidance can make that uncomfortable feeling decrease, at least temporarily.

And once again, the brain learns:
“The more I avoid, the less anxiety I will feel.”

❤️ This is why understanding the WHY behind food avoidance matters. We aren’t simply looking at a child who “won’t try it.” We’re trying to understand what that food experience feels like to that child.

👉🏻Stay tuned for #7: fear of aversive consequences of eating with @drmichaelmilobsky . Be sure to send this to a friend who may like to follow along! 🗣️Comment ARFID if you’d like to learn more!

💕Melanie

Melanie Potock - ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Sensory Processing | Food Avoidance | Anxious Eater | Feeding Therapy | Pediatric Feeding

What if your child truly doesn’t seem interested in eating?

This is #5 in my ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series, and we’re starting a closer look at the three hallmarks or subtypes of ARFID.

👉🏻First up: Apparent lack of interest in eating or food.

For some children with ARFID, hunger may not be a particularly strong motivator, and eating itself may not feel especially pleasurable. Sure they still eat some, but not much, and not with much interest.

Then something important can happen.

They begin making negative predictions about eating:
💭 “It probably won’t taste good.”
💭 “The bites will start to taste yucky”
💭 “I don’t want to get too full.”

They may skip meals, eat very small amounts or have increasingly limited experiences with food. And…those patterns can affect the signals they receive from their own bodies. As I discuss in my courses, repeatedly ignoring hunger cues can make those cues less noticeable, while feelings of fullness may become increasingly intense or uncomfortable.

Then comes the cycle I want parents & therapists to understand:
👉🏻Avoidance reduces anxiety IN THE MOMENT.

And the brain learns:
“The more I avoid, the less anxiety I will feel.”

❤️ That’s why simply telling a child with ARFID, “You need to eat” misses so much of what may be happening underneath the behavior.

Next up in #6: ARFID & avoidance based on the sensory characteristics of food.

♥️Melanie
Melanie Potock - ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Food Avoidance | Lack of Interest | Anxious Eater | Feeding Therapy | Pediatric Feeding

😰 Anxiety doesn’t always LOOK anxious.👉🏻This is #4 in my ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series, and this is something I really want both parents AND feeding therapists to recognize.

😢When we think about an anxious child, we may picture crying, hiding their face, becoming dysregulated or desperately trying to get away.
Sometimes anxiety looks exactly like that.

😶But sometimes it’s much quieter.
A child may freeze. Become unusually quiet. Get silly or distracted. Negotiate. Ask question after question. Say they aren’t hungry. Only eat in front of a screen. Or simply find ways to avoid the food or eating experience altogether.
Of course, any one of these behaviors does not automatically mean a child is anxious.

But it’s worth getting curious.
Instead of only asking:
“Is this child upset?”
Try asking:
“What might this behavior be communicating?”
Because a child doesn’t have to be crying for an eating experience to feel incredibly difficult.

❤️ Keep following along for #5 in my ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series. Send this to a friend who might be wondering about anxiety and extreme picky eating…

♥️Melanie

ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Anxious Eater | Food Avoidance | Feeding Therapy | Pediatric Feeding | Picky Eating

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😰 Sometimes the hardest part isn’t the FOOD. It’s the FEELING.
This is #3 in my ARFID,PFD, ASD & Anxiety series.
When we see a child avoiding food, it’s easy to focus on what’s right in front of us:
The smell.
The texture.
The taste.
The appearance.
And yes, those things can absolutely matter.

But for many children with ARFID, we also need to pay close attention to what happens before they ever take a bite.
The worry.
The anticipation.
The physical feeling of anxiety.
The urge to AVOID.
And avoidance works…temporarily.

The child avoids the food → anxiety decreases → the brain learns, “Avoiding this made me feel better.”
And that can make avoidance even more powerful the next time.

It’s why I use this analogy when I teach:
“Having ARFID is like desperately wanting to learn to swim, but being too scared to approach the water.”
❤️ Our job isn’t simply to get them into the water. It’s to help them learn, one carefully supported step at a time, that they can approach it.

Hope you’re finding this series helpful! More to come!
👉🏼 Follow for #4 in my ARFID, Autism & Anxiety series.

♥️Melanie
Melanie Potock - ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Food Avoidance | Anxious Eater | Feeding Therapy | Pediatric Feeding | Picky Eating

There’s a BIG difference between a hesitant eater and a truly anxious eater.
This is #2 in my ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series, and understanding that difference matters.

⚠️Some hesitation around unfamiliar foods can be a normal part of learning to eat. A child may need time, repeated exposure & lots of opportunities to become comfortable.

😟But when anxiety becomes a significant part of the picture, we need to look deeper.
👉🏻Is this child simply hesitant?
👉🏻Are we seeing picky eating?
👉🏻Could there be a Pediatric Feeding Disorder?
👉🏻Could this be ARFID?
👉🏻Could an anxiety disorder be contributing to what we’re seeing at the table?
👉🏻Is there another diagnosis to consider, like ASD?

❤️ Because the question isn’t always just:
“How picky is this child?”
Sometimes the more important question is:
“How anxious is this child about eating?”
And recognizing that difference can change how we support them.

👋🏼Follow along for #3 in my ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series. Send this to a friend who may want to follow too, and save it for future reference!

🙂Melanie

Melanie Potock - ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Pediatric Feeding Disorder | PFD | Anxious Eater | Picky Eating | Feeding Therapy

👋🏼Welcome to #1 in my new ARFID, PFD, Autism & Anxiety series.

Over the next several Reels, I’m going to break down some of the concepts I teach in my professional courses into short, practical conversations for parents AND feeding professionals.

And here’s where I want to start:
Before we decide HOW to help a child eat, we need to understand WHY eating is hard.

🤔Could this child have a Pediatric Feeding Disorder (PFD)?
🤔Could it be ARFID?
🤔What role might anxiety be playing?
🤔How about other diagnosis, like autism?

PFD is impaired oral intake that isn’t age-appropriate and is associated with medical, nutritional, feeding skill and/or psychosocial dysfunction. Conservative estimates suggest PFD affects more than 1 in 37 children under age 5 in the United States each year.

Autism is a spectrum, as is selective eating. Autistic kids are 15 times more likey to be selective eaters.

♥️And regardless of a child’s other diagnoses, they deserve a thorough evaluation that looks at the whole child, rather than simply labeling them “picky.”

❤️ Because when we better understand what’s driving the feeding difficulty, we can build the right team & provide the right kind of support.

📌Save this one & follow along. Reel #2 is all about the difference between a hesitant eater and a truly anxious eater. Send this to a friend who would like to follow along too, or save it for future reference!

🙂Melanie

Melanie Potock- ARFID | Autism | Anxiety | Pediatric Feeding Disorder | PFD | Feeding Therapy | Anxious Eater | Picky Eating

😫Want your child to stay at the table longer? Start here BEFORE you worry about how much they eat. 👇🏼

🛏️Think about something as simple as making your bed every morning.
There’s comfort in familiar routines, and kids benefit from that same
predictability of routines at mealtimes.

♥️Try these 3 simple mealtime routines:

🕯️MARK THE BEGINNING.
Light a candle, say a prayer or create a silly family handshake. A
consistent little ritual helps your child recognize: This is mealtime. We’re
here together.

🍽️MARK THE END.
Have everyone take their plate to the counter when they’re finished. Even
toddlers can participate with a little help! It creates a clear ending and
helps reinforce that the next opportunity to eat comes at the next scheduled
meal or snack.

📵PUT THE SCREENS AWAY FIRST.
Turn them off before everyone comes to the table. We want kids connecting
with the people, conversation and food around them, not transitioning away
from a screen once dinner has already begun. Sometimes, screens are permitted…But not if we’re trying to form connections and create conversations.

💕Routines aren’t about controlling how much your child eats. They’re about
creating a predictable, comfortable environment where kids can learn to
participate in family meals.

And sometimes, when kids feel more comfortable staying at the table... they
just might explore and eat a little more too.

📚There’s lots more about creating happier family mealtimes in Raising a
Healthy, Happy Eater, the award-winning book I co-authored with pediatrician Dr. Yum. Comment BOOK to peek inside!

👉🏼Which of these 3 routines could you start tonight?

🥰Melanie
Melanie Potock / Mealtime Routines • Picky Eating • Family Meals • Toddler Mealtimes • Feeding Kids • Mealtime Behavior • Responsive Feeding • Pediatric Feeding

🌽 Before you hand your toddler corn on the cob… try this 20-second
trick to make it safer.👇🏼

Corn on the cob can be tricky for little mouths because those firm, round
kernels can pop off whole and be a choking hazard.

Once your child has the chewing skills to manage corn on the cob,
here’s one simple way I like to modify it:

🌽 Take a small, sharp knife & carefully run it down each row, splitting
the tops of the kernels.

That’s it!

It took me less than 20 seconds for this entire ear of corn, and breaking
open those firm kernels makes them easier for little mouths to manage and may even make them easier to digest.

Of course, the knife work is an adult job. Keep sharp knives completely out
of your child’s reach & always supervise young children while eating.

And remember: teeth alone don’t determine whether a child is ready for a
food. Chewing skills, feeding development & the individual child matter too - corn kernels are the perfect size to plug a toddlers airway.

🌽 SAVE this before your next corn-on-the-cob night & SHARE it with another
parent of a toddler!

🥰 Melanie

Melanie Potock Corn on the Cob • Toddler Feeding • Choking Prevention •
Food Safety • Feeding Tips • Toddler Meals • Pediatric Feeding • Chewing
Skills

🥦 “Sneaking” veggies into your child’s food breaks trust… right? Not
necessarily. 👇🏼

Let’s talk about this, because trust absolutely matters when we’re feeding
kids. ❤️

I would never recommend lying to a child about what they’re eating,
especially if they ask what’s in a food.

BUT… we also don’t announce every.single.ingredient in every recipe we serve.

When you make boxed mac & cheese, you probably don’t say:

“Good news! Tonight’s noodles contain powdered cheese, whey, milkfat, salt
& a few other ingredients!” 😜

It’s simply mac & cheese.

And THIS mac & cheese recipe simply happens to include some very finely
chopped cauliflower.

I like cauliflower here because when it’s cooked until tender & chopped
into teeny-tiny pieces, its color, texture & mild flavor can blend beautifully with the pasta. Spiral pasta works especially well because it grabs onto the cheese sauce AND those little pieces of cauliflower.

✨ Ideally, involve your child in the cooking. Let them see the ingredients,
stir, sprinkle, chop when developmentally appropriate & get curious about how foods come together.

But if tonight you’re simply serving a mac & cheese recipe that happens to
contain cauliflower among its ingredients?

🥳You do not need to make cauliflower the headline.

Serve dinner. Enjoy your family. Let the food be food. ❤️

Because protecting trust doesn’t mean providing an ingredient-by-ingredient
announcement every time we cook.

IMPORTANT: If your child is an extremely anxious eater, has significant
food fears or becomes distressed by changes to familiar foods, please
substitute or add ingredients like this only with guidance from your child’s
feeding therapist.

🥰 Melanie

Melanie Potock Picky Eating • Feeding Therapy • Sneaking Vegetables •
Veggies • Mac and Cheese • Cauliflower • Food Exposure • Anxious Eaters